Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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