Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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