ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
