Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
