Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize