Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Terrible idea I love it
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize