Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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