I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
