Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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