well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
they need to just BURY HIM!
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
