I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...