i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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