I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
