This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
