Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
