porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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