do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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