I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
