sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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