I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Randomize
