You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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