Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
