Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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