I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
