Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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