only you would photoshop your dick
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
