i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
