My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
