are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize