We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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