You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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