You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
