That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
how can u be prego again
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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