Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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