I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i just google imaged poop.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
