I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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