her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
