just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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