Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex

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  (703): the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex http://tfl.nu/ydbw
  Replies (31) Good night (5328) Bad night (722)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.

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  (317): I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking. http://tfl.nu/ymvd
  Replies (52) Good night (3899) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.

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  (317): I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment. http://tfl.nu/sxji
  Replies (13) Good night (5229) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.

  (631): View more from New York

  Cruelly.

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  (631): I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away. (631): Cruelly. http://tfl.nu/5k20
  Replies (23) Good night (4141) Bad night (1281)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.

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  (973): random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question. http://tfl.nu/ra0q
  Replies (17) Good night (6337) Bad night (1262)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...

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  (781): I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet... http://tfl.nu/t0x0
  Replies (7) Good night (1175) Bad night (3577)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.

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  (617): gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist. http://tfl.nu/2uj6
  Replies (35) Good night (1302) Bad night (4494)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level

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  (516): I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level http://tfl.nu/2gco
  Replies (3) Good night (2067) Bad night (1020)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.

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  (206): My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in. http://tfl.nu/9rsk
  Replies (14) Good night (3128) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki

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  (250): I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki http://tfl.nu/rhok
  Replies (14) Good night (2975) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.

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  (870): I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team. http://tfl.nu/hbuy
  Replies (6) Good night (2105) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.

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  (218): There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon. http://tfl.nu/foxi
  Replies (5) Good night (1600) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?

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  (608): I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay? http://tfl.nu/awtj
  Replies (2) Good night (581) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now

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  (908): He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now http://tfl.nu/rqph
  Replies (2) Good night (466) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....

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  (503): I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea..... http://tfl.nu/kqab
  Replies (4) Good night (347) Bad night (925)

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