I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Umm I'm too high to move.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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