So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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