I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
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