But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize