Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
