Your mouth is God's brothel.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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