The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
