That's intense
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
