Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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