i don't like sucking hair
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
