yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
