eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
